What Is Perspective PowerTM?
Ten years ago I quit my post as a doctor at the Royal London Hospital (a medical career is compulsory when your last name is “Bedwell”) and took Perspective PowerTM on the road. Since then I’ve taught the ideas in this book with evangelistic fervor.
Choosing to leave an extremely prestigious teaching hospital with the dream of becoming a motivational speaker was a gigantic decision; and not made lightly. Ten years after taking such a momentous (foolhardy?) leap of faith, it’s clear to me that I've survived and thrived because Perspective PowerTM works. And, as you take to heart and use the ridiculously simple strategies in this book, you too can smash through the barriers to your success as easily as punching your way out of a wet paper bag.
Another True Story (FYI: Nobody Nearly Dies!)
I love my job! Delivering keynote speeches and teaching Perspective PowerTM workshops is a tremendous fun. And, over the years, I’ve befriended many wonderful people from lots of different industries.
That said, the one thing I don’t love about my work is all the airplane travel. It’s stressful, chaotic and some people are downright unfriendly. A few years ago, I boarded a plane, sat down and greeted the man in the next seat…and he completely snubbed me! When I repeated myself, he “replied” by lifting his ‘Wall Street Journal’ between us to prevent further conversation. I was shocked and stunned. What a jerk!
So I sat there, stewing in my own juices. (Wishing he would talk to me, just so I could ignore him back.) Until I felt a little nudge in my ribs. I did try hard to ignore him, I’ve never been so riveted by the safety card. Then, as he nudged me again, I could feel myself getting annoyed. But, as I turned towards him (intending to give him a ‘nudge’ of my own), he handed me a scribbled note: "Would you mind calling my wife and telling her I'm safely on the plane and on the way home? Thank you." He wasn't a jerk, he was deaf. Turns out, I’m the jerk!
This unexpected revelation (about him being deaf, not me being a jerk) transformed my negativity in a heartbeat. My thoughts immediately turned to other ways I could help, my irritation melted away and my body language told a whole different story.
What lessons can we learn from this story? First lesson: If you’re sitting next to me and don’t want to talk, pretend to be deaf. Of course, if you are going to do that, don’t answer your cell phone. I’m on to you!
This anecdote also illustrates a crucial (and simple) fact of life…
An Important Lesson
Our thoughts, feelings and actions don’t have a mind of their own, they’re driven by our perspective. My initial “what a jerk!” outlook drove my negative attitude, annoyance and unhelpful behavior. What was I thinking? Idiot! How was I feeling? Irritated. How was I acting?...Icy!
There are only three ways to respond to a situation; we can think about it, feel towards it or act on it—that’s it, folks! These three reactions are so central to our mental makeup that scientists refer to them as the ABCs of psychology. A for Affect (emotion), B for Behavior and C for Cognition (thinking). And these three responses—encompassing the entire human experience—are an expression of our point of view.
Notice what happened when I found out the guy was deaf. Right away, I began falling all over myself to accommodate and assist him. When my outlook changed, so did every aspect of my response. Moreover, this abrupt change in my demeanor didn’t require any corresponding change in reality. Discovering the truth didn’t change reality one jot. It’s our point of view on the things that happen to us—not objective reality—that dictates every one of our thoughts, feelings and actions. And changing that point of view changes our response, sometimes dramatically.
Passive Versus Active…
On the airplane, a new piece of information became available to me and, in spite of anything I did, this new data triggered a passive shift in my point of view. I wasn’t actively looking for different perspectives on the situation, it just happened.
And, most of the time, this is how we live our lives. Passively accepting the most obvious points of view without further thought. While we think about what we do, how we feel and sometimes even about how we think, we seldom focus on how we see our world. And so our perspectives remain, for the most part, unconscious and unexamined.
To be clear, I’m not suggesting that all these viewpoints are fatally flawed, simply that we adopt them by default. And, most of the time, that’s just fine. I doubt your passively acquired point of view on Lindsay Lohan’s latest personal calamity affects your life to any great extent.
Here’s the problem: If—as I did in the airplane anecdote—you allow your perspective to be passively slapped back and forth by the vagaries of life, you relinquish control of your thoughts, feelings and actions. And the points of view you have on yourself, your circumstances and your future are far too important to be acquired passively because they drive the responses that define the direction and quality of your entire life.
Think back to the last time you tackled a problem. Did you, at any point, consciously and methodically evaluate not only the specific details of your problem, but the point of view from which you viewed it? Did it occur to you to reframe the problem itself from an entirely different perspective before dashing off after a solution?
Recall the last time you felt overly anxious about something you were required to do. Did it even cross your mind that the anxiety you experienced was driven by your point of view and that adopting another, equally valid, viewpoint would alleviate your fretfulness?
And yet you certainly have the capacity to reflect, not only on your thoughts, feelings and actions, but on the points of view that drive them. Let’s go one step further. Imagine if you could actively change your outlook on any situation, at any time. Each new viewpoint would dictate different thoughts, feelings and actions. And so, in any situation, multiple points of view would give you a range of ways to think, choices of how to feel and different options for action.
This core principle packs the punch behind Perspective PowerTM and explains why, regardless of the challenge, the people who cope best are those able to view it from different angles.
And so Perspective PowerTM is the ability to look at a situation from multiple angles so you can think clearly, feel great and take effective action.
How We Play Out Our Perspectives
I recently asked a teller at a local bank to assist me with an extremely simple international transaction. As soon as the teller heard the scary word “international,” it was painfully obvious she felt totally out of her depth. She fumbled around for a few moments, increasingly fretful and eventually tracked down a colleague for advice.
As the teller looked on, the assisting bank employee dealt with the money transfer smoothly and efficiently. Afterwards, the teller commented sheepishly: “Thanks for your patience, it turns out I did know what to do.” By the anxious teller’s own admission, lack of knowledge didn’t cause her to buckle under pressure. Rather, her perspective on her own ability caused her head to buzz with mental static as she panicked and dashed off to request help.
You play out your perspectives every day of your life. If you see yourself as a highly-creative person, is this perspective likely to be a self-fulfilling prophesy? Sure! You’ll take your ideas seriously, get excited and make time to try them out. If you see your job as meaningless, are you likely to work hard and inspire others with your enthusiasm? Not likely! And will the way you see a problem determine how you think about it, worry about it and the efforts you take to try and solve it? You bet!
The common denominator in all these scenarios is the word “see”. Your perspective drives every thought, feeling and action. When you limit your outlook to the expected and the familiar, nothing changes. If you keep seeing things the same way, you'll keep doing things the same way, which means you'll get the same results.
If you want better results you need to think different, feel different and do different. And the key to changing every one of your thoughts, feelings and actions is to change your perspective. This simple fact of life holds the key to unlocking your full potential.
From now on, whenever you’re not thinking the way you want to think, feeling the way you want to feel or acting the way you want to act—flex your Perspective PowerTM. Whenever you are stumped, overwhelmed, anxious, misunderstood, immobilized, frustrated, stressed or simply fighting the urge to lash out, you’ve guessed it—flex your Perspective PowerTM. It is the one thing that always makes a difference.
Bottom line: When you change how you see things, you’ll see things change.
